Head First: "Jesus was a Calvinist"

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

"Jesus was a Calvinist"

"God planned the fall."

"I believe God did not exist before creation."

"God only loves Himself."

"I saved a bundle of money on car insurance."


These are some of the fightin' words you'll hear from sofyst, a student at Criswell College, proud Texan, proprietor of sofystication blog and self-proclaimed pope of the ad.hoc forum. This kid is SO Calvinist that John Calvin himself was once overheard saying, "Damn, that kid sure is a Calvinist!" (although, in sofyst's defense, he prefers to be called a supralapsarian, to avoid, uh, confusion).

I drew sofyst's name in Zeke's really cool Santablogger gift drawing, where we all select a gift ($25 limit) for the person we draw and blog about it. The recipient then purchases the selected gift for him/herself and (what else?) blogs about it.

Whether it was a preordained event or the luck of the draw, I'm pleased to have drawn sofyst as my Santablogger buddy (his real name is Adam, after the guy who screwed it up for all of us). We don't agree on much, and each of us is firmly convinced that the other is completely wrong. But the beauty of our relationship is that we've never (that I can recall) exchanged angry words, we don't try to fix each other, and even though we taunt each other endlessly, I think we both take it with pretty good humor. I feel respected in our exchanges. To the extent that it can be said of web-based relationships, I genuinely consider him a friend.

It didn't really take an awful lot of thought to come up with an appropriate gift for Adam. Here's a quote from a recent post:

"If anyone knows me, they know that I have a silly-boy-crush on Ann Coulter. She is genius, she is militant and she is beautiful. What else is needed?"

Someone recently put up a phony comment on his site, posing as the conservative hottie. He was convinced that I was the culprit and swore revenge. Well it wasn't me, but I found out who it was (someone who is related to me, but I won't name names. I'm no snitch!).

Given his adoration for the leggy right-wing lady, I thought I'd offer Adam something from the "Coulter for President" campaign HQ. He can choose from bumper stickers, buttons, shirts, caps, mugs, or even a cotton camisole, all bearing the "Coulter '08" logo. He will surely be the envy of all his Texas buddies.

Adam, I wish you peace, joy, and all the love and happiness you can handle. I hope you have a very excellent Christmas, my friend.

You're still wrong ;-)

6 comments:

Caro said...

HMMM!
Seems as if your friend has found another way of looking at our spiritual absolutes, thus "creating" a few problems for the decided ones.
I must agree that God planned the fall, also winter, spring and summer. Oh, you meant that FALL, as in Adam, et al.
Well, using our human term of "planned" is not very accurate (how can one be a little inaccurate?), we might consider the idea that God, alone, had choice: Which universe, out of the innumerable possibilities He could create (imagine), would He select? HIS decision incorporated ALL of the subsequent act(ion)s of every creature therein. ALL of our (alleged) choices are known to Him BEFORE we existed; therefore, His plan for us WAS His initial choice (of this universe from among all others). Thus, may we conclude that He did, in fact "plan the fall"?

jeff said...

[tilt]

nathaniel adam king said...

Yes, I would say that He did plan the fall, and delighted in it...

I would however not say that God, alone, had choice. I am so ardent in my determinism that I believe even God to be lacking in the ability to 'choose'. Freechoice? something only created within the mind of man...

Kc said...

So when did you decide to believe that? ;-)

nathaniel adam king said...

It came naturally...

Caro said...

If God does not have free choice, who does and where did such begin?
Determinism may not be able to determine where it came from or where it leads.
Moy curioso!