Head First: Dorse, the imperialist dog.

Friday, September 29, 2006

Dorse, the imperialist dog.

Did you know that New Jersey is one of two remaining states in the union that does not allow self-service gasoline? Nope. You are not allowed to pump your own gas in the Garden State. The only reason I can think of is that they want to prevent the spread of germs by keeping people from drinking straight from the pump. I mean, you never know where that's thing has been.

Anyway, regular was $1.97/gallon this morning. This was the first tank of fuel I can remember that cost me less than $35. So, as I sat in my SUV while someone else filled my tank this morning, the little red Dorsey-in-a-devil-suit sat on my right shoulder and said, "Y'know, if only this war really was about oil, I might support it."

15 comments:

Sable Chicken said...

In California gas has just dropped from $ 3.25 to $ 2.80. I wonder why it's so much higher here. When I bought my van in 2002 I could fill it for $30. now it $65 for a full tank, but most the time the pumps just shut off when you get to $50. It's out of control.

somewhere I saw a gas sigh that read

unleaded
$ ARM
plus
$ LEG
premium
$ FIRST BORN

nathaniel adam king said...

The only reason y'all do not have self-service is because y'all are a bunch of lazy no good for nothing liberals.

;)

I thought the war was about the oil. I mean, isn't that why gas prices are so high? Because we are stealing oil from the Iraqis.

Wait...no that doesn't make sense...

sandytrif said...

I heard that the reason gas prices are dropping is because of the election~~Vote for the guy/gal in there already and they will keep prices low? Who knows~just glad the prices are dropping and I don't have to pump it.
sandy

seƱor jefe said...

I heard that the reason gas prices are so high is because the Congressional Committee on Power and Industry is in the back pocket of the oil lobbyists.

I mean, what b.s.! We're rejoicing that my brother paid $1.97?!? That's not cheap! .57 is cheap...

The only reason gas was up to $3 per gallon was to make $2 seem not-so-bad, and make us forget about the days when we paid less than $1 per gallon.

What a freaking scam! War schmar... This isn't about Iraq. It's about Exxon, Mobil, Citgo and the rest of those greedy bastards, who gobble up any technology that would alleviate our need for oil.

I mean, I remember my dad's 1983 Honda Accord that got over 40mpg. It wasn't a $35,000 Hybrid. It wasn't some space-aged technology. It was a $14,000, 4-cylinder car. Where the hell did THAT technology go. What about the early 90's and the Honda CRX that got almost 60mpg? It was just a car with an engine... nothing fancy (or expensive).

But, with the advent of the gas-guzzling SUV, 30mpg seems like a dream, nowadays. And with the advent of $3+ per gallon of gas, 1.97 has people excited, as well.

Well, I'm sorry, dear brother. I do not share your joy, because we are all deceived by oil barons and their money-grubbing, politician love-slaves (although I DO think it's cool that, in your "Full Service" world, you never have to suffer that nasty gas smell on your hands...)

dufflehead said...

prices are set by opec. citgo/venezuela wants the price per barrel to be $50. wasn't until they said that that the price per barrell dropped almost $10 to $60 (last i saw).

Scott said...

in saudi arabia and venezuala they pay about $.15 per gallon.

Society's Elite said...

$1.97 Dorsey?!?! WTF?!?!?

Up here in Hudson County it's $2.25/gallon. Although I heard if you flirt with the gas station attendant, they'll drop it another 28 cents, so the price will go down to $1.97. Umm, Dorse, how DID the price get that low for you??

Do tell my friend...

Anonymous said...

We have 1.95 gas in Iowa right now but I'd pay 1.97 if I could find more than 2 full service stations in the whole DSM metro area.

I think Senor Jefe needs to remember that a comparison of gas prices from the 50s through today in the U.S. incidates that prices are still relatively low when inflation is factored in.

That said, I won't stop bitching until gas is down in the 1.18 range again...

mark said...

Dorsey - Whenever I am in Jersey, it feels so un-natural to have someone pump the gas for me. When you go out of state, does it feel strange to pump your own gas? Last time I was in your neck of the woods, I was so surprised at how low the prices were. I just assumed that prices would be higher in NJ because all stations are full-service. How do gas stations make any money (paid attendants, low margin on fuel, and lower soda & cigs sales) because everyone stays in their car to get gas?

dorsey said...

I've grown quite comfortable not having to pump for myself, and when I'm out of state, I just HATE getting my hands all gas-smelly.

As unbelievable as it sounds, New Jersey fuel prices are cheaper than in surrounding states because of our relatively low taxes on gasoline. As goofy as the no-self-serve law is, NO ONE is in favor of rolling it back. First, there are something like 50,000 jobs that would be lost. Second, liability insurance at a full-serve station is apparently a fraction of the cost of that of its self-serve counterpart. Third, only a small segment of consumers favor self-serve because it's quicker than waiting for an attendant. The list goes on, but I'm satisfied with the status quo in this instance.

Phil Miller said...

Hey Dorsey,
I just spent some time over the 'Slice of Laodicea' site(I guess I have masochistic tendencies), and I thought I'd come over here to cleanse my pallet. I think I first saw it mentioned on your blog, so I blame you.;-)

There was a girl that I went to college went that never pumped her own gas until she was 19. That's just sad. Also, are there really 50,000 gas station attendants in New Jersey? You'd better hope they don't go on strike.

Anonymous said...

Phil-just say "No" to the slice...

Shieldsy said...

What are you complaining about ... you have some of the cheapest petrol prices in the world. You consume 40% of the worlds oil so about time you started paying for it.

Last time I saw a non-self-service petrol pump in the UK was about 1979.

dorsey said...

"What are you complaining about."

Nothing. I didn't complain about anything.

If you don't get me, maybe you should keep your inferiority complex over at SCP. They're way more inclusive than I am.

Now bugger off.

Shieldsy said...

I wasn't blaming you personally for using 40% of the worlds oil ... though it's a very magnanimous gesture of you to take the sins of your nation so personally.

Don't worry ... buggering off ... have a nice day etc